The world’s a bitch.

Well, not the world. Just its people.

I think I’ve mentioned too many damn times of how hard it is to become an obedient Muslim woman. Now, don’t think I hate being one, don’t think I’m feeling oppressed like how you readers might think, but when I say it’s hard, it ain’t because I don’t want to do what I’m supposed to do.

What makes things hard is the judgement from you, the disrespect, and the way you think it’s okay to bad mouth my decision.

I am living in a place where even the majority of Muslims don’t wear the headscarf, and even when they do, they try to style it accordingly to be accepted by common mindless society. It will still cover the skin, but not the curves, which contradicts what the Prophet said about being clothed but naked.

So that’s a no to the tight jeans or leggings. Those expose too much sin, sin which I’m actually concerned about a long time ago before people start judging my fashion sense.

And hence why these conversation occurs too much:

Mum: Go change into skirt

Me: What for? These pants aren’t that tight.

Mum: They still show your backside and thighs

Me: They’re covered by my shirt

Mum: Well, your shirt isn’t long enough

Me: I’m not wearing skirt.

Mum: You are.

Me: No, I don’t want to be a freak.

That’s one example, here’s another one:

Friend: Why are you wearing skirt?

Friend: You look like a freak.

Friend: Ew.

Me: Yeah, can’t, forbidden from wearing jeans.

Friend: By who?

God.

Me: Mum.

And I blame Mum a lot, because she’s the only reason seem to be accepted by society. If I said it was my own choice, they’d think I’m the freak one, and I just thought that if I blame it on someone else, I wouldn’t have to take the fall for it.

I suppose I can be childish like that.

However, let me tell you the actual truth, there’s never a moment where I don’t feel like a good person covering my sins, but I also walk feeling like a failure because I can’t seem to be understood.

I don’t judge people when they live as they want, so why am I judged when I’m simply following little rules? Why do I have to be the freak one? Because I’m a minority, is that it?

Dude, words are sharp. Careful with those.

Leave people and their skirts alone, just like how they leave your choices alone. You can dislike the lifestyle, but please understand that it becomes so hard being a proud Muslim when people judge too much.

I personally think me wearing what I want to wear effects only my reputation and life, but please do tell if it effects yours as well so I can understand where your hate comes from. You can think it’s weird, you can laugh at it, but I’m begging you to help everyone feel comfortable in what they choose to wear. And please, you’re not at fault, you have every right to say what you need to say, I suppose it’s entirely mine for not being able to be strong enough to stand on my ground and ignore the acid comments.

Here’s to me, my skirt, and I